New Posts and a New Point of View

I know it has been forever since my last post, but I want to start again. Though I am giving no guarantee that I’ll succeed, I do hope to post at least once a week from hear on out. I’m not just posting for the blog, but for me as well. I find that blogging is almost a therapy; it allows me to work through my problems by forcing me to look at them. So here is blog number one:

Turning Point

Not many of you know, but I have been going through a really hard time right now. The church where I am at has almost become a torture chamber. Though I do feel fed by the church, I also feel alone. I have really lost a lot of the good friendships I used to have there, friendships that really helped to support me. Now every time I enter those walls I do not feel alone in a room full of strangers, but alone in a room full of “friends”(which in so much worse by the way). That’s how I’ve been living for the last several months, alone. I never had anyone to talk to, or to lean on for my faith, but I have changed the way I’ve been looking at the situation. For I the last few weeks I have been working hard to try and see time as a place for me to grow in my relationship with God. I also know, after talking with my mom and sister in the lord Jess, that it’s a time to take charge in my relationship with others. I know it is going to be difficult, because through these weeks I have definitely put up strong walls against the people there, and sadly have grow a root bitterness too, but I have to do it. I know that there are great people in that church, and need to allow them in, because if I don’t-my faith will die.